


Trey & Matt, Go Fuck Yourselves

by weedle_writes_gay_stuff



Category: South Park
Genre: Nonbinary Character, Other, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-01-31 08:53:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21443542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weedle_writes_gay_stuff/pseuds/weedle_writes_gay_stuff
Summary: What are the odds of every kid in town being trans? 100%. Because fuck you, and also trans rights.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 27





	1. Nonbinary Stan

**Author's Note:**

> I think pretty much everyone in the fandom is bummed out about Board Girls (aside from the edgelords, who can get fucked and have always needed to go fuck themselves) and frankly, everyone who is is right to be. Since the rest of us need some cheering up, I decided: why not do oneshots about EVERY kid in South Park being trans or genderqueer in some way? 
> 
> I’m happy to take suggestions for how people should ID or chapter submissions btw, although with this first chapter I’m doing one of my favourite headcanons, enby Stan. If you wanna write a oneshot of your own for this anthology, get in touch with me, either on here or on my tumblr (@weedle-testaburger)! 
> 
> (And in the unlikely event Trey, Matt or any of the other SP writers see this: everyone in SP is trans now, and fuck you for Board Girls.)

Stan rushed up to his room after dinner, having realized while he was having it why he was in such a depressed funk. He paused before doing what he wanted to do and locked his door, his ears pricked up and attentive of any footsteps that might come his way.

He opened his closet and pulled out a plastic bag hidden in one corner, his hands shaking as he laid it down on the bed. Part of him felt awful, like he was a freak for doing this. But stronger than that was the feeling that he needed to do it to calm down and feel like he wanted to.

Trying to avoid too much conspicuous noise from the ruffling of the bag, he pulled out a light blue circle skirt and black pantyhose. For a moment, he stared at them wondrously, transfixed by how pretty they looked. He thought for a moment of Wendy and Heidi, and how cute they looked to him in clothes like these. But then a nagging sense of guilt entered his head, telling him he was being a creepy pervert for this.

He tried to force that voice out of his head, and pulled off his blue jeans and socks, hastily pulling on the pantyhose. He was surprised how easy it was given that it just kinda stretched whenever he pulled; for some reason, he’d assumed it was easy to rip and it wasn’t really proving to be. It was kinda awkward to put on, admittedly, but when he got it on, it sat fairly nicely, probably helped by him wearing briefs instead of boxers today. Even so, it felt weird to be wearing them, kinda like he was wearing the bottom of a morph suit.

Then he picked up the skirt, pulling it up to his waist and feeling it fit comfortably around it. He stepped to one side and looked at himself in the mirror set into the wardrobe door, and realized he couldn’t stop smiling. He... he was pretty! He liked how this skirt and pantyhose looked on him a lot! Excitedly, he took a photo of himself in the mirror, and as he checked it, he smiled even broader. He really was pretty! Hell, he almost looked as pretty as Wendy or Heidi.

But all of a sudden, that guilty feeling came back to him. That was nonsense, it told him. Of course he didn’t look as good as Wendy or Heidi, because they’re girls, and girls are supposed to wear skirts and dresses. Boys aren’t. The only boys who wear girls’ clothes are drag queens and pervvy creeps. When he looked down, his sense of pride at his own prettiness had given way to the guilt.

He sighed, and pulled the skirt and pantyhose off awkwardly, putting them back in his closet carefully. Then he pulled his jeans back on, lay on his bed and sat there, feeling like he would cry. He looked at the photo again, and after a moment, clicked the Delete button. But before he could hit OK, he thought of something he could do. He wasn’t sure it was a good idea, but he wanted to try it anyway.

He hit Cancel, and then went to Facebook and found Wendy. They hadn’t talked one-to-one in a long time, but given she’d said she was genderfluid when they played superheroes, he figured she was more likely to be understanding than anyone else he knew. 

“Hey, can I talk to you about something”, he typed.

Putting down the phone, he rested his head against his pillow and sniffed, still on the verge of tears. At this point he didn’t expect a response, so when he heard his phone buzz a couple of minutes later, he was pretty nervous about checking. With shaky hands, he looked at it and read, “Of course! What’s up?”

Stan paused, having half a mind to tell her ‘never mind’ for fear that he’d just creep her out by telling her about this. “I think I’m not sure about my gender?” he messaged.

Her response was even quicker this time. “Aww, ik the feeling Stan”, she had said. “How do you think you feel?”

Surprised by how friendly she was being about this, Stan responded, “I guess I feel like I don’t want to be a guy but I’m not exactly a girl either?” He decided to admit what he’d been doing. “Tbh I got a skirt and tried it and for a minute I felt really cute but then I felt like a freak”.

“I’m sorry”, Wendy replied. “Is it OK if you show me? I bet you look really cute!”

Stan’s heart missed a beat. Wait, she wanted to see what he looked like in a skirt? Nervously, he picked the photo he’d taken in it and sent it to her, putting the phone down while he waited for her to reply. The phone soon started buzzing in rapid succession, and he picked it up to see, “OMG STAN”, “YOU LOOK SO PRETTY OMG”, and a heart emoji. He felt like he could cry in that moment, for the exact opposite reason he’d wanted to cry just before.

“Aww thank you so much!” he typed. “But like I feel like it’s not OK for boys”.

“Of course it’s OK for boys! Boys look amazing in skirts and dresses!” answered Wendy.

“Ik but I feel like if someone people think is a girl wants to not be seen as a girl they can wear trousers and suits and stuff and have short hair”, Stan typed. “But if I wanna not be seen as a guy I can’t just wear a skirt or dress when I want and I wish I could”.

Wendy was typing for a little while after that, probably rewriting while she worked out what he meant, and all the while Stan was vaguely anxious. When it did come he read through it quickly. “So you aren’t a girl and you aren’t a guy but you wanna be seen as feminine? If that’s what you mean yeah I think I get what you feel,” it read.

“Thanks :)” Stan replied. “Idk what to do about all that tho”, he added.

“Maybe you could change your pronouns?” Wendy suggested. “If you want I can call you by something other than he/him”.  
Stan was shocked by her offer. She was being more understanding than he could’ve hoped, even if he didn’t quite understand what she meant. “Like what?”

“Whatever you like! Maybe they/them?” Wendy offered.

To Stan’s surprise, as he read that he realized... no wait, they realized... that sounded great! They weren’t sure they could convince everyone to call them ‘them’, but even if it was just Wendy who would, that was wonderful anyway. “I’d love that”, they typed.

“Awesome!” Wendy answered, and Stan felt like they were the luckiest person alive.

Then they heard a knock at their door. “Dad, I don’t wanna talk!” they yelled.

“It’s me, Stanley!” their mother called back.

“OK, just a sec,” Stan responded. They messaged Wendy, “Brb mom wants to talk”, and shuffled to the door, unlocking it and opening it.

Sharon came in with a basket of laundry, and handed several pieces of it to Stan. As her son hanged it up, she noticed an oddly miserable look on his face. “Are you OK, Stanley?” she asked.

“I guess,” Stan replied dispassionately, focused on hanging up his clothes.

“If something’s on your mind, you can tell me about it, sweetie,” Sharon said softly.

“Mom... I dunno if you’d understand,” Stan admitted.

“Even if I don’t, I wanna try,” replied Sharon.

Stan swallowed hard, realizing she was being sincere. “Um... do you promise not to freak out or get mad at me?” they asked.

“Of course!” their mom smiled. “If you want, we can just forget about it if it’s uncomfortable.”

“Thanks,” Stan mumbled, and they pulled out their phone and got up the picture of them in the skirt, passing it to their mom.

Sharon had to admit, she wasn’t expecting what she saw. Stan was wearing a skirt, posing for a photo in the mirror. She was curious where he’d got it from, but any confusion or shock she might’ve had at him looking like that vanished when she noticed something. Stan was smiling more in that photo than any time since they’d all moved to the farm. And seeing Stan this happy made her smile too.

Stan looked up at their mother, and was kinda shocked to see her smiling. Even more shocking was that it didn’t seem like a forced uncomfortable smile, which was what they’d kinda expected. It looked more like she was genuinely happy for them. “I’m just really glad to see you happy, Stanley,” she beamed, and she leaned down to hug them. Stan hugged back tightly, more grateful than they thought they’d ever been.

After they broke off their hug, Sharon asked, “So, um... are you a girl now?”

“No,” Stan replied. “But I’m not a boy either, if that makes any sense,” he added.

“Yeah, I think it does,” Sharon smiled. “So, do you want me to not call you him anymore?”

“Can you call me ‘them’, mom?” Stan asked shyly.

In that moment, Sharon saw how worried her child was about this, and how much they needed her reassurance and support, and she hugged them again. “Of course it is, sweetie,” she smiled.

Stan was crying now, big time. What they’d just heard from their mom was better than the best they could’ve hoped for, and between sniffs they got out a muffled, “Thanks for understanding, mom.”

“Anytime, sweetie,” Sharon replied. “It doesn’t matter what you wanna call yourself or what you wanna do or what you wanna be- you’re still my kid and I’ll still love you, no matter what.”

Stan hugged her as tightly as they could, and when she finally left the room and they sat back on their bed, they weren’t crying about feeling gross or ugly, but smiling like a dork at the acceptance and support they’d found.


	2. Genderfluid Kenny

Tinny 8-bit blips echoed through the McCormicks’ dilapidated living room, as Kenny sat with his sister, each of them holding an Intellivision controller and messing around. Much as the guys always made fun of him for not having a modern ass console like they did, Kenny would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy it sometimes.

He kinda sucked at Q*Bert, but seeing Karen skilfully bounce across each block, dodging Shades and Wrongway with lightning-fast reflexes while Kenny crashed into them awkwardly always impressed him. Sometimes she’d even glance up at him in the brief moment after finishing a stage and grinned at him, and every time she did he’d flash a grin right back or stroke her hair. How Cartman could say girls weren’t good at games, he had no damn idea.

But for some reason, tonight even this wasn’t really making him feel much better. Sure, he was doing about the same as normal, and she seemed to have noticed he was down, slowing a bit so he could keep up on with her score without feeling like a total loser.   
Eventually, though, Karen got up and went to turn the Intellivision off. Turning to face her brother, she asked, “You OK, Kenny?”

“Yeah, I guess,” he replied listlessly, looking at the ground.

“C’mon, I know you’re sad,” Karen persisted.

“It’s dumb, though,” insisted Kenny, frowning.

“Nothing that makes you sad is dumb!” Karen declared. “You’re such a good brother, I wanna help you like you always help me!”

That was when it seemed to hit him- when she said ‘brother’. It finally made sense to him why he felt like was making him feel down was so dumb, but that almost made him feel worse, like he couldn’t talk about it without weirding her out. “Well... I don’t feel like a boy right now,” he mumbled.

To his surprise, Karen’s face lit up. “Ohh, I getcha!” she grinned. “Just a sec,” she added, dashing off to the bathroom. Kenny sat there confused, but waited patiently, deciding to let Karen do what she wanted just in case it did cheer him up.

When she returned, she had a makeup box in one hand and a mirror in the other. “Where’d you get that?” he asked confusedly. Karen just smiled in a way that told him not to ask questions, and he chuckled.

“Do you wanna be a princess?” Karen asked, smiling.

“I’d love to,” Kenny replied, his face lighting up. Then he realized something. “Aren’t mom and dad gonna kill us if they find me like this?”

“They’re not gonna be back from the bar for ages, you know that,” Karen replied dryly.

“Good point,” Kenny smiled, and he obediently sat still to let her do whatever she pleased with the makeup.

Karen opened up the makeup box and got a stick of concealer, and started gently applying it to Kenny’s face. Her brother smiled and shut his eyes to make it easier for her to avoid getting it in them, but it surprised him that she did it almost flawlessly, only slipping a couple of times. Eventually, she said, “You can open your eyes now,” and when Kenny did, he looked in the mirror- and couldn’t keep from smiling like a big dork. He looked really pretty, his normally blemished and messy face looking soft and pretty. 

Next, he watched her dig out a brush and blusher and applied it to his cheeks. Kenny wanted to smile a lot right now, but he figured if he did he’d mess up what she was doing, so he desparately held his face still while she put the blusher on. As soon as the brush left his face, he broke out into a grin, and Karen giggled at him. “It suits you, Kenny!” she smiled. “You look so pretty now.”

“Aww, thanks!” Kenny replied, still amazed how sweet and supportive she was being. Much as he loved Karen, he hadn’t expected she’d do something like this for him.

“We’ve just got one more thing to do,” Karen grinned. “You can try and do it yourself if you like!” She passed Kenny a lipstick and the mirror, and eagerly Kenny twisted it up, puckered his lips and slowly and shakily put it on them, looking in the mirror at how he was doing. And to his surprise, he actually seemed to be doing it right!

Once he was done, Karen looked at him and declared, “Wow!”

“What’s up?” Kenny asked. “I did it OK, right?”

“My big sister is so pretty!” Karen giggled. Kenny felt like he’d just died and gone to heaven when he heard that phrase, and he blushed so hard it was really visible even through the makeup. Both he and Karen started giggling happily.

“I have an idea!” Kenny piped up a few minutes later, and he dashed out of the living room to get to their room, shut the door, and carefully pulled on his Princess Kenny dress. Looking in the mirror, she grinned at how pretty she looked and felt. Man, she’d missed getting to be a princess!

Karen’s eyes lit up as she saw Princess Kenny come out of their room, and she rushed up to the Princess and gave her a hug. “Hi, Princess!” she grinned.

“Do you think the makeup goes with my dress?” the Princess asked.

“Of course!” Karen replied. “You always look beautiful in that dress!” Princess Kenny blushed hard, and Karen sat down, patting the space next to her and offering the Princess a controller. “Wanna play Intellivision with me?” she asked.

The Princess couldn’t turn down an offer like that, and she continued playing delightedly. She still wasn’t really doing too well at Q*Bert, but at this point, she’d be lying if she said she gave a shit.

The Princess and her sister sat together gaming for hours, and every time Karen cleared a level, seeing her sister’s happy, proud grin made all the struggling in the hard later stages totally worth it. In the end she couldn’t quite beat her high score, but the Princess giving her a hug to commiserate cheered her up no end.

As they prepared to go to bed, though, the Princess’s expression started to look worried. “Are you OK, Princess?” Karen asked.

“I just realized, I’ve gotta get all this stuff off,” she said sadly. “I wish I didn’t have to.”

“Aww,” Karen replied. “You know, just ‘cause you take off your makeup doesn’t make you not my sister! When you’re my brother, you’re my brother, when you’re my sister, you’re my sister!”

The Princess beamed at her. Karen was a smart kid, she thought to herself. And a loving sister.

“Want some help getting the makeup off?” she asked. The Princess nodded, and sat down on her bedsheets as Karen got out the makeup remover from the box. She cleaned up the Princess’s face carefully, and remarked as she finished, “I still think you look super pretty without it.”

The Princess smiled, and then stood up to get out of her dress. “Don’t you wanna sleep in girl clothes?” Karen asked.

“Yeah, I do,” the Princess admitted. “But mom and dad will be back tomorrow morning, and if they find me like this, they’ll kick my ass!”

“I won’t let them!” Karen declared confidently.

“Karen, please don’t fight them,” the Princess protested sadly. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I’m not gonna fight them, silly!” explained Karen. “I’ll just keep the door shut until you’ve had a chance to get changed in the morning! Just cause they’re asses doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get to be who you want to be!”

“You really think that’ll work?”asked the Princess as they entered their room.

Karen picked up a doorstop and wedged it under the door. “I dunno about you, but I don’t think they can get past that,” she giggled.

“Good point,” the Princess laughed. The two of them got in their beds carefully, and just before Karen drifted off to sleep, the Princess said to her, “Thanks Karen. You’re the best sister in the world.”

Karen grinned as she dozed off to sleep, and the Princess soon drifted off herself, so contented she couldn’t put it into words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while since I did another chapter, I've been really busy with work! Hope you enjoyed this one! :3


	4. Trans Nichole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With the last two fics I kinda didn’t have any specific idea how old the characters should be in them, but for this one they’re supposed to be about 10, nearly 11, hence why Nichole is anxious about the stuff she is. Anyway, enjoy the fic! (Or I guess ranting at me for hating Board Girls in the comments if that’s your cup of tea lol)

Five minutes until the end of class. Token glanced over at his watch, then back at the clock on the wall, hoping they were slow so this shit would be over sooner rather than later.

Looking up, he noticed the teacher wasn’t looking in his direction, and sneaked a glance at his phone. He smiled as he turned it on and saw Nichole’s pretty smile staring back at him from his lock screen, and clicked the notification from her.

Then he read ‘Can we talk about something in private when you finish class?’, and his face fell. Not wanting to be difficult, he replied ‘OK’, and glanced back at the clock. Suddenly he was wishing it was actually fast.

In five minutes, or something like that, the bell rang and Token headed out of class, waiting by his locker trying to stay cool. That was when he heard a “Hey babe,” from behind him.

“Oh, hey Nichole,” he replied, smiling a bit harder than he probably needed to. “What’s up? And uhh, where do you wanna go that’s private?”

“Can we go find some bit of the playground that’s quiet?” she asked. “I don’t want anyone to hear.”

“Sure,” Token answered tentatively. He wasn’t sure whether he appreciated her not wanting to let anyone see this or not- it was nice that she didn’t want to embarrass him, sure, but he kinda wished she’d come out and tell him whatever it was. Not that he thought he needed to guess.

The first sign it wasn’t what he imagined came when she held his hand and led the way to the quiet part of the playground she had in mind. Usually if she wanted to take a break, she’d be quite hands off with him, at least until they’d both had some time to kinda re-establish their boundaries. Today, though, she seemed to be holding his hand tighter than usual.

He was realizing, whatever was going on, it wasn’t just a breakup. In fact, it was probably the opposite. Maybe something bad had happened with her family? Maybe she’d had a fight with the girls, or Cartman had said something really fucking dumb again? He kinda hoped it was just the last one, so he could get an excuse to kick Cartman’s ass again.

Nichole cleared her throat. “You OK, babe?” she asked.

“Yeah, sorry, I was just kinda distracted,” Token admitted.

“Sure thing. Can you focus on me right now, though? I need to tell you something.”

Token nodded. “Go for it.”

“You promise you won’t get mad?” Her hands were kinda shaking in his. It seemed like she was pretty damn worried…

“Of course! When have I ever gotten mad at you? I promise I’ll understand.”

With this reassurance, Nichole swallowed hard and then said in a small voice, “…I’m trans.”

As he took the words in, and saw the anxious look in Nichole’s eyes, Token didn’t quite know how to react. So he kinda let a whole ton of words he hoped would be supportive fall out of his mouth in rapid succession. “Oh! That’s OK! So like, do you want me to call you a boy’s name now? Do you wanna break up cause you’re not gay? Should I get mom and dad to help you get hormones or a binder or anything like that?”

Nichole’s reaction was startled for a few moments, and then she giggled, realizing what he was inferring. “Token, I’m still a girl! I’m still Nichole! It’s just that… I didn’t wanna tell you, I don’t like telling anyone really, but…” She pried her hands from his, and looked at the floor, still anxious about how he’d react to hearing what she said, but slightly more at ease thanks to how well he reacted just before. “…I was born a boy. I’m a girl, but my parents thought I was a boy at first.”

She looked up at Token slowly, and was surprised to see he was smiling. “You don’t, like… feel like I lied to you or anything, do you?” she said, her voice quivering as she said it.

“Of course not!” Token replied, opening his arms to offer her a hug, which she eagerly took. “I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t tell me that! I’m your fucking boyfriend, you should feel OK with telling me anything!”

“Thanks, Token,” Nichole replied, kissing him on the cheek once they broke their hug.

“I… you really don’t feel like I’m weird or gross for that?” Nichole asked. “I’m honestly scared if I came out, people would think I was ‘really’ a boy even though I’m not and even if they’ve always known me as a girl!”

“Think of it like this,” suggested Token. “Saying you’re ‘really’ a boy cause you were born like that would be like if I went around saying everyone ‘really’ craps themselves because when we were all born, we went round in diapers crapping ourselves.”

Nichole laughed. “You’ve got a point, I guess,” she smiled.

“Do you wanna tell me about it?” asked Token. “You don’t have to, obviously, but like, if you want to talk to me about it, I’m cool with that.”

“I think that’d be nice,” Nichole replied. “I don’t wanna tell you what my parents called me before I decided I wanted to be Nichole, though.” Token nodded. “Cool. So like, when I was… I think 5?... I started realizing I was ‘supposed’ to like boy stuff, hang out with boys, do what boys did. And I kinda told mom and dad I didn’t like being a boy, I didn’t like people seeing me as a boy, I didn’t like any of it. And after a while, they realized I was way happier being seen as a girl, so they started letting me be a girl, and calling me Nichole, because it made me happy. And they kinda went to the school and told them that was who I really was, and if they got mad at me for that they’d send me someplace else.”

“So is that how you ended up at South Park Elementary?” Token asked.

“My parents did wanna move out of Pueblo anyway, but yeah, I kinda gave em an excuse by punching a kid who kept deadnaming me,” Nichole laughed. Token laughed too and high-fived her, and she grinned like a dork at his reaction.

“Sooo, why did you wanna tell me now? Are you worried about something?” asked Token.

“To be honest, yeah.” Nichole looked at her hands and felt her anxiety rise again. “I wanted to tell you cause I was worried you’d find out and be weirded out cause of… you know. The stuff that’s gonna happen to us in the next few years. Making people see me as a girl the last few years was mostly about not letting them see anything that they’d think said otherwise, or threatening to kick their ass if they did. But I’m scared it’s gonna get harder.” She looked Token in the eyes, and realized she was crying a bit. “I know it sounds so dumb, but thinking about my voice breaking, having to shave all the time, not being able to look like other girls do, being really secretive about my body to almost everyone, or just having to give up and pretend I’m a boy on the inside as well as on the outside… every time I think about it, it makes me wish I wasn’t like I am.”

Token hugged her softly. “Nichole, listen to me. No matter how you look, you’ll always be the cutest, prettiest, most awesome girl I’ve ever known, and I love you no matter what.”  
She blinked through the tears when she heard that. “You mean it?”

“Of course!” he answered. “And you never have to worry about me calling you anything other than Nichole, either. Other than maybe ‘the girl I love’, if you’re OK with that.”

Nichole laughed, sobbing a little as she did. “Dude, you’re so fucking cheesy! Thank you!”

When she’d stopped crying, they kissed, and Token suddenly had a thought. “You know how you were anxious about puberty and stuff?”

“Yeah?” Nichole replied, a little confused.

“Can’t you get, like, blockers and hormones and shit to stop it happening to you?”

Nichole sighed a little exasperatedly. “Well, yeah, you can, but you know how expensive that stuff is to get? The treatment for blockers is like $700 a month, at least! My parents love me and stuff, but love can’t buy hormone treatment.”

“What about love and your boyfriend’s parents’ money?” Token grinned.

Nichole’s eyes widened. “Are you kidding?” she replied.

“You know what my family’s like, my mom and dad wouldn’t even notice losing 700 bucks a month! Hell, if anything they’d notice my girlfriend seemed a lot happier.”

Nichole pinched herself. “You’re telling me you’ll pay for my transition?”

“If it’d make you happy, yeah!” Token’s tone was more earnest than she’d ever heard.

“God damnit, I just stopped crying!” Nichole laughed, hugging him again. “You’re the best boyfriend ever, holy shit,” she mumbled into his ear.

“Well, you’re the best girlfriend ever, so it all evens out,” Token teased.

As they sat down together and huddled up comfortably after standing in the cold together for most of their chat, Nichole snorted as she realized something. “You OK?” her boyfriend asked.

“Yeah, but I just realized… you’re a sugar daddy,” she grinned.

“At least I’m using mom and dad’s money better than they do,” he replied, laughing.

**Author's Note:**

> In case it's not clear the bit with Stan and Sharon is kinda done from each of their perspectives, Stan calling themself by their proper pronouns and Sharon not until she knows they go by they/them. Also tbh writing the ending to this made me cry, parental support is the ultimate trans/enby fantasy sigdiguuksv


End file.
